Showing Up When it Matters

You don't always need to be "optimized", but can you show up when it counts?

May 21, 2024

Last week was nuts. Bonkers. Totally cuckoo-bananas. Let’s set the scene:

We went into the week knowing it would be a lot.

I needed a minor surgery and the only reasonable date was last Tuesday morning. My husband, Matt, was already worried about having the procedure the day before a long road trip. Wednesday we were set to drive from Upstate New York to North Carolina where I would be officiating the wedding of a beloved friend. He acquiesced when he realized it really was the only good option and he was going to drive.

Monday morning dawned and a client called with an offer I couldn’t refuse: another facilitator had canceled last minute for a Wednesday morning keynote. A dream gig for me, 3 hours west, and they’d make it worth my while financially.

Except… with the surgery I couldn’t drive myself. I explained the details to Matt, he hopped on board (bless him) and we said yes.

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Monday night I wrote the talk while making dinner and built the slide deck.
Tuesday morning we were up early for surgery (everything went well).
I slept the rest of Tuesday while he got everything together.
Drove overnight to the talk, which I delivered bright and early Wednesday morning.

We slept all day Wednesday. Drove all day Thursday (14 hours!)
Friday was spent preparing for the wedding.

Saturday morning was all the usual women’s wedding things; but as the afternoon unfolded it became obvious that something was off. The Maid of Honor seemed stressed and not all the wedding details were lining up. Without unrolling too many of someone else’s details; things were going sideways. Fortunately, the MoH & I were able to step in, right the ship, and the wedding went on in all it’s joy and splendor.

The hero of the week celebrating with me.

Sunday morning we hopped in the car and pulled in the NYC around midnight (only 12 hours that time). I hopped the first train upstate and made it home in time to teach Monday afternoon.

Wild right?!

Why am I telling you all this? Not to glorify my YOLO life (definitely not).
But to share a few big takeaways from what make a week like that even possible.

Care for yourself so you can show up

If I had been exhausted, under-recovered, misaligned, and unprepared there is no way in the wild, wide world we could have pulled any of that off. For me, having a healthy body at 40 isn’t about looking hot in my bathing suit. It’s about being able to perform as well (sometimes better) than someone 10 years younger than me. It’s having a body, mind, and self I can rely on.

Know your body (and it’s limits)

At 5p Monday I committed to being on stage at 8:30a Wednesday, knowing I was going under anesthesia on Tuesday. I was confident in the commitment because I know my body. I know how it would react and how I needed to eat, drink, and supplement smartly over those 24 hours to make it so. I built that knowledge over 20 years since my chronic illness diagnosis and 13 years in fitness/wellness.

Have an exceptional team you can rely on

The decision to take on that extra commitment wasn’t mine. It was Matt’s. He was the one that had to do extra driving, give up some of his own time (he’d had something planned Tuesday night that he gave up for the gig), and I had to trust he could manage himself along the way. Which I did and he did. Teamwork for the win.

Get clear on boundaries

There was one thing the client would have said that would have been a hard no: lead a workout class. This was a no for 2 reasons: I wasn’t confident I could handle it and I didn’t have enough prep time to keep participants safe. I knew that was my “no”. (Fortunately, they wanted a lecture and we went forward) and went into the call ready to hard line it. Knowing our limits isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s maturity.

Prioritize what actually matters

Last week I didn’t post on socials, write blog posts, or record Better Than Fine. I was slow to respond to text messages and only touched 3 emails. The things that mattered: surgery, speech, wedding. That was it. Everything else was pushed off the plate so we could have the big adventure together.

Make time for recovery

I. Am. Exhausted.

Getting home yesterday I felt a profound wave of relief and this week is intentionally very light. I won’t be going for intense workouts or yoga this week. The #1 priority: sleep. Right behind that is eating and myofascial release. I think High Performance Culture has done a disservice to us all by leaving out just how much recovery comes after a peak experience. Last week was a metaphorical marathon and this week I am recovering as if I ran a literal one.