A quick search will pump you full of plenty of headlines:
How to achieve work life balance.
Work-Life Balance: What it is and 5 ways to improve yours.
12 Tips to Achieve and Maintain a Good Work-Life Balance
For all that available information, it doesn’t seem to be doing us much good. I can remember, back in the 2000s, my boss pushing work-life balance while also doubling my workload in the same conversation. It’s not that he was blind to it; in fact, he thought he was warning me to prioritize myself because he knew the work load increase was coming.
Which sounds good for a leader to do, right?
A quick redux of all that general wisdom includes:
Have “boundaries” and allow yourself down time without phone checking
Something to do with self care, health, etc
Use your vacation time
Have a hobby/make time for loved ones
Be organized, keep your schedule, use productivity hacks, etc
Get a job you don’t hate
But perhaps all the conventional “tips” aren’t doing us much good. The term “work life balance” originated in the 70s and 80s (sources differ on it’s exact origins). So despite at least 40 years in use, 77% of American workers say they’ve experienced burnout and it’s top impact is damage to our closest relationships.
“Balance” doesn’t seem to be working. Maybe it’s time to consider something else?
Work/Life Integration
Integration, by it's definition, is mixing or joining thing together in a successful way. When I work with clients our first objective is to uncover unhelpful beliefs, patterns, or misinformation. Next, we correct that misinformation or maladaptation. The goal is to come to a new set of beliefs that then drive more helpful behavior. Sometimes that’s a simple as providing useful, accurate information; others, it’s a deeper journey.
The primary goal is for clients to leave coaching as a more integrated, whole, complete self with a sustainable lifestyle that supports their wellbeing; as well as the tools to continue that journey on their own.
Work/Life Integration recognizes that each of us is a whole person, coming to the table with our own needs, wants, commitments, and beliefs. How work fits into that may have a general structure; but the details will be as unique as any of our lives.
Through the age of COVID and into hybrid work, we’re all too familiar with the blending of the aspects of our lives.
Work-life balance calls to mind a teeter-totter, where the two elements are separate. Work-life Integration is a weaving of how work fits into your life.
We all have different domains that affect us based on belief, life stage, resources, neuro-divergence, and personal preference:
Circadian cycle and biologically set periods of productivity/rest
Level of self care required and health status
Family demands and commitments
Religious or spiritual observance - whether governmentally recognized or not
Sense of purpose/meaning and it’s relationship to work
Getting Work More Integrated
Integration isn’t a destination; it’s part of the process of living. As you have new experiences, learn new things, or reprocess your past you’re able to make intentional choices and weave those learnings into your current and future lifestyle. When circumstances change, those are processed and integrated - steering your life in that new direction.
Integrating work is no different.
It’s about learning what works for you, then building systems and communicating to support wellbeing, flourishing, and actualizing into a life that works for you.
It’s also important to recognize that the work environment and employer expectation has a huge impact on the ability to shift towards integration.
If you work for someone else, you’re at their employment mercy. However, their flexibility will increase job satisfaction, productivity, and retention - so working with you often leads to their reward.
1. Take Stock
Life any worthwhile lifestyle process, we have to know where we are before we can plan where we’re going. Ask yourself a few key questions:
Is the role work plays in my life working for me?
What is the most important thing in my life right now? Am I spending time on that in a meaningful way? Is it getting the attention is deserves?
When I am not working is work still affecting my quality of life and relationships?
Do I have a day-to-day lifestyle that actually works for me?
2. Brainstorm
Considering the reflections you’ve already done: What would have to change to improve my wellbeing?
Is it your schedule?
Type of work?
Collaborators or communication?
Time spent at work and boundaries when not working?
Productivity, organization, and systems?
3. Gather Information
Even those of us who are self employed aren’t wild and free. We have to offer our products and services at times and in ways our clients are available and in ways that appeal to them. For those working employed by others, we can’t always shift everything we want willy-nilly.
Before making a game plan, speak to the key stakeholders. How much flexibility can you have? Why are the rules the way they are?
Quick anecdote on this: in my early 20s I was working on a software development team (different job than the one mentioned above) and one of our programmers was always “late”, but he was a brilliant programmer so we put up with us. Come to find out that all that brilliant code was being written at 2a and he was “late” because he’d just woken up. If we wanted brilliant code, we had to meet him where he was… which was easy enough and everyone was better off for it.
4. Game Plan, Execute, Rinse & Repeat
Based off the past 3 steps: what can you reasonable change? Start with the most adjacent, possible thing and then move forward.
Remember: incremental change is always going to be more effective than trying to do everything all at once.
The other important thing to highlight is building systems that work for you.
For all the productivity hacks out there; most reference an individual’s personal system. If some business coach’s system doesn’t work for you that doesn’t mean you’re broken; it only means you work differently.
Time management, personal organization, note taking, calendar structure, filing, etc can feel overwhelming to create systems for. They’re an extension of your mind, so don’t just take anyone’s word for it. Try a few things and keep what works for you.